Any Tired Moms Out There?

Motherhood is exhausting! I'm talking I can't even form a complete sentence exhausting. The difference though, between mommy tired and regular tired, is the ability to fake it. Having a child does something to a woman that enables her to push through the most extreme tired. I am still amazed by this gift from God! I can be so tired I seriously think If I get up I may fall over, however suddenly I look to my right at the pile of laundry needing folded and I'm transformed into Supermom. For the brief (very brief)  time I visited a personal trainer, he would always say, "Mind over matter! Your body can do ten more laps than your mind tells you you can." This is motherhood - always doing 10 more laps than you think your body can. Peeling yourself from the couch when you remember the dishes in the sink. Sneaking out of bed as you think about the permission slip you forgot to sign. Waking up 1 hour before everyone else, even though you stayed up 2 hours later, just so you can pack lunches and leave sweet notes. It's the extra laps. I had no concept of this prior to motherhood. I had observed it in my own mother for years, but I didn't truly understand. Mommy energy is being able to wake up at 7:00 AM after only 4 hours of sleep with a teething toddler so you can run all your errands and then move your classroom to your new school. Then heading home, bathing the kids, making dinner, and picking up the house. And once you've completed these things thinking you could probably manage a few more.

My mom said to me the other day, "Wow! You've gotten a lot done. Where did you find the time?" I looked at her and replied, "Oh, I never sleep." So to all the other mothers out there. . . I feel you.  When you are still up at midnight, I probably am too! Eventually it gets better. . . Right?  It has to!  Heres to the extra laps. . . 

One of those days. . .

Warning: I was feeling a little long winded tonight. . . I apologize in advance. Word of advice. . . Just scroll to the last few paragraphs. . . I saved the best for last! :)

I recently had one of those days. . . You know the kind. . . Where you should probably stay home because your frustration has reached such a level, you nearly feel the need to yell at the man who is exiting the entrance at SAMs Club! Yes, exiting the entrance!

My day was a series of unfortunate events. It started when I headed to my new school with H in tow and my 30 minute drive took 70 minutes due to an accident. I was worried 30 minutes would be pushing it, but 70 was a disaster. . . Our wait, in the parking lot of cars stopped on the highway, involved me clapping and waving to Radio Disney in an attempt to distract my impatient toddler. I'm sure the trucker behind me thought I was high or something!

I transferred schools this year so I was on my new campus moving a few things and trying to arrange the furniture. I already told you I had my "helper" with me so you know it was a grueling process. Plus, it was like a thousand degrees outside and the AC in my classroom was smarter than me so we were working in the heat. Did I mention my room was upstairs on the far side of the building? After making 2 trips to the car and back. . . my makeup was melted, even my hat could no longer contain my hair and my clothes were glued to my body. I was praying no one would see me! I decided I had taken all I could stand so we headed out. At least the drive home was quick and the best part. . . H had fallen asleep. All I needed to do was get her inside and in bed.  Unfortunately, I arrived home to a mess from the dog inside and the 2 wild ones outside howling like coyotes. As you can imagine, the ruckus woke my sleeping baby.  I now had poop to clean up, barking dogs, and a screaming toddler. I decided to give up on the nap and brought H to play so I could clean.

I got everything settled and decided to make a few phone calls. The first was to try and get my badge changed to my new school. . . I was  informed, in a less than pleasant tone, that it would not be done until late August. Well that sure didn't go the way I had hoped. I decided to call the bank next to ask about a service charge I had noticed on my checking account. I called the local branch so I could speak with a live and local voice. . . This also didn't go as planned either. The personal banker told me she couldn't help me because she had no way to authenticate my identity over the phone. .  . However, she could give me the 1-800 number and they could assist me. . . So, you're telling me you are my personal banker working at the branch in my own town and you can not "authenticate" my identity, but. . . if call to speak to someone miles away in a different country they can? Well that makes perfect sense! I kept my cool by hanging up quickly before my thoughts turned into words. No sooner had I pressed end, the phone rang. It was my doctor, calling to cancel the appointment I had made 3 months ago because something had come up. . . Of course it had!

I was so done with the day I took to social media to gripe, something I try to never do! I angrily typed something about today not being my day. . .within 10 minutes, I deleted it. Everybody's got problems, who am I to complain on Facebook? I follow a rule whenever I post anything to social media. I always ask myself, why am I posting this? To complain? To brag? To make someone else feel bad? Unless my reason for posting is to simply share, then I don't hit the "post" button.

My mom arrived to my home and took on baby duty so I could head to the library to tutor a student. On the way there, a police officer followed me for at least 3 miles and I was certain he was going to pull me over and issue me a citation. . . I didn't think I was breaking any laws. . . But it seemed like the appropriate next event in my series of unfortunate events. At tutoring, I worked with my sweet girls and told them this hour was going to be the best part of my day. . . Judging by their expressions, I'm certain they thought I was crazy! After tutoring I headed to SAMs for the essentials. . . dog food, toilet paper, and wine. As I left, I had to stop at the snack bar for my obligatory coke Icee. Of course, I waited while the only person working made 3 pizzas before handing me a cup for my drink. . . Yep! Seems about right. While I was annoyed, something came out of nowhere and made me say with a smile, "Thanks! I appreciate your help."

On the way home from the store, I was reliving the events of my day, when it hit me. . . This was Pastor Robert's fault. . . I hope he doesn't read my blog - unlikely. He had given a message on Sunday about producing good fruit and essentially staying true to your beliefs during the struggles. As we left church on Sunday, I had told my parents I felt convicted during the message. . . Looking back, I think in that moment. . . God chuckled at me as he said, "let me show you convicted." Today was my "struggle" or rather "opportunity" to live out my faith. Yes, it was just a bad day. It wasn't the end of the world. My family was safe and healthy and everything would be just fine again tomorrow. . . But these are the days we were made for. We can all handle the good days. It's how we handle the days filled with little hiccups that really matter.  What were my reactions like to the moments of frustration? Did I show grace and love when it was needed?  How did I represent what I believe during the "struggle?"

I learned two things today. . . 1. I will NEVER again leave church claiming to feel convicted.  2. While my day didn't go as planned, there were still so many blessings. I may have been caught in traffic, but at least I wasn't the one in the accident. I might not be able to move into my classroom as quickly as I hoped, but I will get to spend extra time with my little one. I wasn't really feeling appreciation for my slow service, but I seemed to lift the spirits of the woman I spoke to.

I'm thankful days are short and we get to start over fresh each morning. Tomorrow. . . good day or bad day. . . Will be a blessing.

Who do you value?

I am busy! There is no other way to describe it. When someone asks how things are, my response is always, "Busy!" I go at full speed from the moment my feet touch the floor until my head hits the pillow. I often joke with my friends that I can do more in just 5 minutes than most can do in 5 hours. I'm known for fitting 30 hours of life into 24 hour days. My refusal to allow anything to be just mediocre means I will never have "enough" time. I often find myself looking into the life of my girlfriends wondering how they have it all, do it all, and look fabulous. I long for perfection! I am as Type A as they come. I can't walk past something without straightening it. I get excited when things are color coded. The container store is like therapy. Seriously! 

As I try to juggle it all, I'm sometimes left feeling unappreciated and unnoticed. Sure, I knew when I signed up that this whole being a mom gig could be a thankless job at times, but surely MY daughter would be thrilled when she saw I had arranged her dolls. Or my students would notice I had stayed late organizing their journals in nice neat rows so they would be easy to locate. It's not about the praise, but rather the acknowledgment of my efforts. Despite all this, today I was validated by a respected colleague. Her words were simple, however powerful. "You are valued." With those 3 words, my years worth of work was validated. I shouldn't need the affirmation to give value to my work, but let's be real. . . I do! We all do. I've yet to meet a person who didn't like to hear a "good job" every once in a while. 

I know each of us have people in our life we could not survive without. My mom is my go to person. She can help me with anything at anytime. My dad is my Mr Fix It and my wise counsel. My best friend is my gossip buddy, my crafty expert, and my confidant. I would be incapable of being me without them.  They are the ones who talk me off the ledge when one of my crazy paranoid ideas has left me a nervous wreck. They humor my silly antics. When my worry wart mom side kicks in, they help reassure me. They embrace my passion.  They support my need for  justice. I value the time and effort they so graciously give to me, expecting nothing in return. I don't praise them enough and it would be impossible to thank them enough. I value them just for being present in my crazy chaotic world! 

Who do you value? Who is it that makes it possible for you to do life everyday? Do they know?  "You are valued" went a long way with me and I know it will do wonders for others too! 

Confessions of a Recovering Hoarder

 

I am a keeper. I am a collector of many things. I like to think of myself as somewhat of a historian, preserving items for a future generation. My mom sees things a little differently. . . She thinks I am a full blown hoarder. I do however have my dad on my side. I think I may have inherited this trait from him. For as long as I can remember, my mom has strategically forced my father and I to sort through our things. I can even remember one year she decided to get rid of one thing everyday. Ahh!! That News Years resolution nearly caused me a breakdown! We have spent decades, father and daughter, trying to save our precious collections from the minimalist. My plan has always been to hide my treasures before she could find them. My dad would let her kick them to the curb and then sneak out at dark to retrieve them from the trash and relocate them to his stash in the garage. You can only imagine the entertainment this has provided the neighbors over the years. 

While my saving may seem ridiculous to some, to me it has a purpose. I can look at an item and instantly tell you who gave it to me and for what occasion. I see my treasures as keepsakes, mementos. If you ever give me something, it would be safe to bet I will have it for years to come.

Once I became a teacher that only took my hoarding to a whole new level.  Teachers are notorious for saving things.  You may look at an empty coffee can and see trash, however when I look at the can I see the perfect container to hold my new pencils.  If saving trash isn't bad enough, I now find myself purchasing junk to save.  I must place part of the blame on Target for this one.  That dollar section is going to be the death of me!  "It's only a dollar," I think as I load 2 more sets of flashcards, for a subject I don't even teach, into the buggy.  I am convinced all of these things will come in handy one day.  As a teacher, I also feel obligated to save every picture a student has drawn for me and each tiny trinket I was presented as a token of appreciation. This has left me with tubs upon tubs loaded to the max.

In my early years of hoarding, I was still living at home so all of my junk was stored safely at my parents.  Then once I left home, I rented a storage space to ensure I had adequate room for my belongings.  Everything was going well until the minimalist started downsizing.  Suddenly and without warning. . . every single time I visited my childhood home, I was sent away with loads of junk I had saved over the years.  You know the saying, "out of sight, out of mind." This phrase had taken truth in my life and to be honest. . . I had forgotten about my mementos.  The more I dreaded visits to my mom's. . . the more I realized. . . I have a problem!  I am officially a hoarder!  

My Confessions as a Hoarder:

1. I have every single movie stub and ticket from any event I attended
2. On vacations, I pick up every brochure I can find and save it. . .
3. Do you remember. . . back before texting. . . those notes we would write and fold in cool shapes. . . Yep - saved those too!
4. Pressed flowers from my high school homecoming date are still placed neatly inside a hardback book
5. T-Shirts from elementary, middle school, high school, college. . . you get the picture!
6. Cards I have received for all occasions.
I could go on and on, but I will spare you! 

Once all of these items ended up back in my actual possession, I realized it might be time to start letting some things go.  In truth. . . most of it was trash!  I finally sorted through the majority of it.  Some things went to trash, others to charity, and a few things I found creative ways to save as keepsakes.  Check back soon for details on my suggestions for organizing the chaos of your keepsakes.